Encourage & Rebuke In Love; Biblical Principles for Nurturing & Correcting our Kids

We had practiced hard and long. Joshua, 6, knew what three moves he would do for his gymnastics showcase. The day of the presentation he was confident, said he was ready, and then the excitement
began.

The older boys, more experienced, more advanced, went before his class. They did flips, forward and backward, and even multiple ones. They fascinated Josh and he wanted to be just like them, not in the future but on this day, his presentation day, so he decided to try his hand at their performance. He went to the mat, started in the right position and then the convulsions began. He looked like he was slam dancing with the floor and had really bad body ticks. After a few body slams, he ran off the mat. He was done. I was disappointed and soooooooooo embarrassed, but he was my child and I couldn’t let my embarrassment distance myself from him especially with the extreme comments  from two other parents.

One tried to tell me he did a great job while the other said with pity, “You have a busy boy there, don’t you? You must get really tired.” In that span of three minutes I learned the important balancing act of encouraging my children even when they do something humiliating or horrendous, whether age 6 or 36.

Consider the mother hen who takes her chicks under her wings. Being that close she can shield them
from external forces and comfort them in her bosom. Though being called a mother hen stereotypically gets us a bad rep as a nagging, overbearing mother, I want us to see that a mother hen does what is necessary for her chicks to fly on their own. Like the mother hen, we have to have our children close enough to shield and comfort them. When the time comes for the hard word when they mess up, our children have the memory of the shielding and comforting mom and can realize the encouragement even in the rebuke, if we handle them with care.

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Creating Stability for Our Children: Implementing God’s Order in Your Home

“Mommy, please don’t adopt us,” my nine year old said and then began to explain as he saw my brow raise and eye squint trying to figure out what he really meant. “I hope you don’t ever give us away. Please don’t,” he begged as he hugged me around my neck. He said this some months ago after hearing a presentation at my church that had just begun an adoption and orphan care ministry. That was the first time he heard about children being adopted and knew that it entailed someone giving away children and someone else taking them in. After I explained the general reasons why parents put their children up for adoption and that he and his brothers would be staying with us until somebody died, as long as I could help it, he smiled, settled down and started back playing with his brothers. Everything was once again well in his world.

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Parenting: A Do-It-All Mom’s Guide: How to Cut Corners & Remain Balanced

With her whole heart, elbow on table and head resting on hand, she turned to me and sighed as we talked about our goals, for us and our children. She wants the best for her child, who has food allergies, so she prepares his lunch the three days a week he attends school. If he goes to school full time “then I’ll have to prepare his lunch every day and that’s more work for me.” Immediately her sentiment resonated with me. This wasn’t a lazy mom trying to get out of work to watch soap operas and talk on the telephone. She was just overworked and tired. And like her, I would love less work.

Sometimes I do less work. At times I toast frozen waffles instead of making homemade pancakes, choose permanent press outfits so I don’t have to iron the boys clothes or play a Veggie Tales DVD over conducting a character development lesson. Motherhood ain’t no joke so if I can cut a corner I’m going to consider doing so, if it’s not detrimental to my children. But here is where we mamas cuttin’ corners may get in trouble. Perhaps not immediate but in the long run our decisions to do less than the best may have a negative effect on our children. This we have to consider as we seek to make our children not just good societal citizens but good citizens of God’s Kingdom.

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The “Love Manifesto” for 2012: Easy Ways for Parents to Model Love & Service

Christmas was electrifying. The sparkling lights, the glistening snow (in most cases) and the holiday cheer that buzzes always has me in a glow. I love that time of the year when people seem friendlier, smile brighter, and folks are lending helping hands. I don’t know about you, but when December 26 hit, all that seemed to change. The buzz was silent. The sparkles fizzled. There was no Christmas music playing, no gracious sayings and fewer smiles. It was like someone had turned off the Christmas cheer switch and everyone had gone back to their self-focused lives. Well, for 2012 I declare that not so. I declare that we have Christmas cheer throughout the year. Let this be the beginning of a lifetime of years where throughout the year we graciously give of our time, talent and treasure to others, particularly those outside of the Christian faith. This is our mandate, always has been our mandate, but we seem to fall in line with the world’s way of helping someone only during the holidays. Let us teach our children to give charity, or love, throughout the year, right along with our regular routines.

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Stop Sibling Rivalry the Bible Way: How to Help Your Kids Show Love & Kindness

 

We have heard these, maybe even said them ourselves, when our children don't get along and are at each others' throat: "These kids just can't get along;" "It's just sibling rivalry." Maybe their behavior is sibling rivalry, but are we resigned that they won't get along because they just can't or do we just wait it out, expecting the conflict to go as the children grow? Parenting expert Abbey Waterman, a mother of eight and home educator for more than 20 years, says parents have to foster brotherly kindness in their children and not just expect it to happen.

"I didn't let my children ‘have friends’ outside of the family until they could get along with each other," said Waterman, whose children range in age from 23 to 6. “We would go to church and I would have them head straight to the car after service. They didn’t get the privilege of socializing with their friends at church.” She once made a bickering son and daughter share a room, forcing them to deal with each other and work out their issues. Today, the children are close.

Waterman's tactics may seem extreme, but God expects us to go through radical means to get radical results.

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