Sunday
Jun032012

Outlaw the In-Law Wars & be the BIGGER PERSON

We looked great, happy even… in pictures, that is. But once we said “cheese” for the camera and snapped back to real life, we were at each other’s throats hard and heavy. 4 years ago, my late mother-in-law, Earnestine Mays and I, were about to kill each other! I felt so victimized, like Regina Hall's character, Candace did in Think Like a Man when she first met her future mother-in-law.

My father-in-law, Willie Sr., on the other hand, is really laid back, a lot like my husband—who I think is his father’s twin personality.

So Dad Willie and I got along royally from day one.

Before my mother-in-law passed away of lung cancer a year and a half ago, we had resolved our issues and gotten a better understanding of each other, thank God. “Mama Ernie,” as I called her, turned out to be a great friend and shopping buddy, and was one of the wittiest women I’ve ever known.

That’s why it felt like someone stuck a dagger through my heart when Mama Ernie discovered her cancer in stage 4. It had already metastasized and she lived for only 3 short months after being diagnosed.

Her passing was one of the saddest days of my life.

Before we got things right, though, we were like oil and water. We couldn’t see eye-to-eye on anything or find a way to blend our personalities. We couldn’t even pretend to be amicable.

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